I believe God is healing me...
It may be through CAL 101, via John Byrd and the good folks at Calistoga Pharmaceutical, but I believe He is directing my "healing".
Last year when I came home to "fade away", I began spending more time with Him- in His word, in prayer... He decides when I check out. The phase one CAL 101 has allowed me to see a future... focus on other things than the constant focus of CLL that has consumed my life since 2004. God has given me the confidence to move forward.
I apologize to my CLL Forum Friends- regular and Christian: I guess I should be more diligent in posting, outlining my trial experiences...The trial I am on is pretty good. It has given me more energy, and best of all- hope.
I like/love the people from the forums,We have a strong bond that ties us together... a terminal illness. I followed many, and have seen many lose their battle. I have contributed for over six years now, starting with a Lymphoma forum before CLL Forum and CLL Christian Friends existed. I rarely frequent them these days- just a quick check to see how people are, then off living life and focusing on other things. I need to focus on something else for awhile. Besides, the real advice is to seek a qualified CLL Specialist and leave the strip mall oncologists alone. Beyond that, give control and thanks to Him that really IS in control, our heavenly father. He will direct your path.
Permanent electronic holiday continues.
Going to read a book--- not a Kindle, but a dead tree book.
God Bless,
Permanent electronic holiday continues.
Going to read a book--- not a Kindle, but a dead tree book.
God Bless,
Randy, I can't tell you how happy I am that you are continuing to do well. I have been a sporadic reader/poster at CLLCF for about three years now. And I know you have been through a lot. It doesn't matter to me if I keep in touch with you on a forum or by reading your blog. It's just wonderful to know you are doing well physically, spiritually and emotionally. You continue to be such an inspiration. And your friends know where to find you.
ReplyDeleteJohn began CAL-101 yesterday. His neck already looks like it has gone down a little bit. I hesitate to even say this because it seems next to impossible that any drug could work so fast. But his neck really does look better.
I understand what you're saying about hope. I feel the most hopeful right now that I have felt since John's diagnosis in 2007. I really appreciate that you took the time to share your experiences with me going into this. And don't you dare put any guilt on yourself for your sabatical. We all just want the best for you!
Shari,
ReplyDeleteThanks for the kind words. I pray John does well on the CAL trial...
God has been speaking to me lately on contentment... I am trying to follow, and avoid doing a Jonah...beached covered in Whale vomit.
God Bless,